Just Heather

Brenia doesn’t like to wear pants or shorts anymore. She tells me she wants to wear dresses like “Rella.” I keep telling her if she wants to dress like a princess, she’ll have to learn to sit like one. Clearly, she doesn’t pay any attention to that.  I had to buy her 3 new sundresses because she kept wearing the same dress every day, even though it was dirty and there were plenty of other clothes to wear.

Laughing at Mir’s Friday Flashback, I suddenly realized I could rival her myself in the food follie department. I love to cook, but I’m the biggest disaster you’ll ever see in the kitchen! Here are a few of my more memorable disasters.

  • When I was 12, I made chocolate chip cookies with a friend. Nothing fancy, just the Nestle recipe—with a twist. We added 1 cup of salt instead of 1 teaspoon. Worst cookies I have ever eaten in my life—and that includes the Zeer-oh’s I once got for free with coupons (never, ever eat fake Oreos).
  • We got a call from our mortgage company as we were buying our first house saying we needed to come down as soon as possible to sign something we missed. Not wanting to screw up our closing date, we got right in the car and went—leaving potatoes boiling on the stove. Needless to say, we returned to a pot of black lumps. I didn’t even attempt to clean it.
  • Several years ago, my one and only attempt to make an apple pie from scratch almost resulted in a trip to the emergency room. I have this fancy-schamncy apple peeler-corer-slicer that does exactly what it sounds like. It was dirty and, being the lazy ass that I am, I decided to use a paring knife instead. I sliced right through that apple and into my thumb. It bled for an hour before I decided to get a second opinion. I called my dad—if you knew my sister, you would understand why I thought of him as an expert—and described the cut. He says “Give it another 20 minutes. If it doesn’t stop bleeding, you probably need stitches.” Dad has always been a fan of the wait and see medical method. I butterflied it and eventually it did stop. I still have that scar.

Happy Birthday to Amy, a frequent—yet silent—visitor!

  • Arrived at the correct time for my checkup.
  • I lost a pound, which is okay since I gained too much the first time.
  • The baby’s heartrate is significantly slower (to be expected in the 2nd trimester), so there goes the gender by heartrate theory.
  • They let the student nurse attempt to draw my blood.
  • Notice I said attempt.
  • After two tries, she gave up to let the nurse finish the job.
  • The nurse had a bit of trouble too. Apparently the first vein just suddenly stopped producing blood after 1/2 a vial.
  • She switched arms (again) and filled all 6, leaving me looking like a drug addict.
  • I have an ultrasound scheduled in 4 weeks.
  • This one should tell us if we can change this blog skin to another color.
  • November is still forever away.

Baby.Sokol has been updated for those of you interested in my gestational activities.

For the rest of you—still pregnant. Move along.

I showed up for my doctor’s appointment today—about 24 hours early! When I realized I had the day wrong I knew we had a problem. Tomorrow is Stacia’s last day of school, which brings afternoon parties and early dismissal. The receptionist cancelled the appointment and rescheduled me like she does it every day. Then I realized, with the idiocy pregnancy brings on, she probably does!