Just Heather

Here I sit minding my own business, typing out an email to my dear friend Chelle when I suddenly hear a persistent “drip, drip, drip.” The usual suspect is sick as a dog and has not left my side since she woke up at 7am. Our other mess maker has been at school for hours. Something is clearly amiss. I look up to find water dripping from the ceiling.

That is when I remember that I ran bleach water to wash the bathtub & toys in anticipation of finally fixing the cracks that began months ago. I know you are thinking I left the water running—it was my first thought too even though I distinctly recalled turning it off. I dash up the stairs to find I had not gotten that far along in my memory loss. Apparently the crack has just reached catastrophic proportions.

At least it’s bleach water so I shouldn’t have to concern myself with mold in the drywall. I won’t even begin to worry about it bleaching the carpet. The munchkins have destroyed it beyond all recognition already. I only need to worry about the ceiling caving in around us. Well, at least I won’t be here to see it.

I have to go pick up Brenia’s antibiotic. They’re thinking pneumonia since Stacia had it last week, and I’m patting myself on the back for having saved myself a trip to the doctor by having Brenia checked out then. Though, with the way she has been yelling everything today I’m guessing we have an ear problem too. Either way the drugs should kill it by Christmas.

Maybe I’ll come home and the ceiling will dry and be all better. *la, la, la* I can’t hear you!

Today, for the second day in a row, I actually remember that I, myself, need to eat lunch when I feed my little ones. I reach into the fridge to grab my leftover chicken noodles only to discover they are nonexistent. Apparently, he decided he was more worthy of the meal than I even though I just spent $22 on 15 meals to stock the freezer for him.

Never mind that it trashed my rule of “nothing over a dollar” when I did my grocery shopping this week, thereby completely throwing off my savings calculations for the month. Never mind that since I knew he would take them to lunch every day I didn’t bother to get a single meal I would actually eat myself. Never mind that I am a nursing mother and in desperate need of nutrition. By all means, eat what you like. I’ll just grab something else.

Except we all know that once my original idea went out the window I got distracted and forgot to eat again. (Look! Something shiny!) I guess I could just be happy with today’s news that I’ve lost 25 of my 34 baby pounds. Not that my failure to eat lunch really has anything to do with it. I generally make up the calories with a giant bag of potato chips or these yummy, generic oreo cookies. Not to mention the great deals I’m finding on Christmas candy, which—let’s face it—will never actually last long enough to get in the stockings!

Chelle was just talking about the faerie at her house last week, and I giggled remembering the “it wasn’t me” refrains when I was growing up. The “not me” phenomenon has come back to haunt me. We now have a goost at our house—commonly referred to as a ghost by those over the age of three.

The Goost stole the baby’s pacifier. The Goost kept her from taking a nap. The Goost colored on the kitchen floor, and The Goost spilled milk on the kitchen table. So far, The Goost appears to be a friendly—albeit messy—ghost, but we’re not taking any chances. Stacia is becoming an expert Goost-shooer to keep it is safe for Brenia to go to the potty. That process is hard enough on its own.

If The Goost sticks around much longer, we just may need a bigger house. We’re starting to get a bit cramped as it is.

Go ahead. Make fun of my shopping habits, but I’ve saved $6000 so far this year on my grocery bill. That may not buy a house, but it means the difference between staying at home with my three girls and getting a part-time job.

Rachael alerted me to the fact that my picture was included in an article on The Onion. Go figure. I get interviewed on national television, compared to Michael Jordan in the Chicago Tribune, and picked up as a syndicated article by the AP but it takes appearing on the front page of The Onion to impress him.

I took Lorelai to the doctor today because her eyes are yucky. The nurse weighed her just in case the doc had to prescribe medicine. She weighs 9 lbs. 15 oz. now—that means I’ve gained 10 ounces in just 6 days. I can’t believe how fast she’s growing.

The other girls went with us too because they aren’t feeling well either. The doctor looked at her eyes and checked her out all over, landing on pinkeye. Now we have to put drops in her eyes every day. And by we, I mean him.

We came home from Thanksgiving with colds—every last one of us. Now, when my family gets a cold it hangs around for weeks at a time and usually creeps into something else. At least once a year we have a month long illness drama.

Stacia’s cold typically settles into a sinus infection. Brenia ends up with ear infections. Spencer just keeps the cold for weeks on end and becomes a big, whiny baby. I typically pick up strep throat somewhere along the way.

This time there’s a bit of a twist. My cold passed through in under 2 days. Must be the vitamins. Spencer seems to have bypassed the major drama as well. Stacia is still sick and getting worse. Lorelai’s cold seems to have settled in her eyes. My poor baby is all goopy.

Yesterday I finally took the girls to the doctor—all three of them, just to be safe, even though Brenia seemed to be missing the yucky part as well. Brenia so far still just has the cold, along with her usual allergies. Lorelai has pinkeye. Stacia has an ear infection and pneumonia. Pneumonia! How did I miss that? If I can get the girls settled into bed later, I’ll dust off a spot for my Mother of the Year trophy.

The holidays should be all about family. They should be fun and relaxing, what with not having to work and all. Instead they are stressful, tiring and full of headaches. They end up being about which in-laws you can piss off the most.

Each year we load up the car with children and presents to travel…somewhere on Christmas day. One year it’s my family, the next year it’s his. It’s tiresome, but the one year we attempted to put our foots down and go nowhere it just didn’t work out. We ended up going to his grandmother’s house—in our pajamas—anyway. On a full year, we have 6 rounds of Christmas in addition to our quick morning at home after Santa has visited.

This year Round 1 is this weekend. Despite the fact that it is 2 weeks prior to the actual holiday, it will be my favorite. It will be calm and peaceful. No one will be rushed to get to the next location. I won’t spend the entire day wishing I were somewhere else. My children will have the opportunity to actually enjoy their gifts—and the loved ones who have provided them—instead of just watching a blur of wrapping paper fly by on our way out the door.

Christmas Eve is the worst. On a night that should be peaceful and warm, we start off at one of the coldest places on earth—my mother-in-law’s house. Then we all go to his grandmother’s house until it’s too late to enjoy leaving cookies for Santa. I never have the opportunity to sprinkle reindeer food for Rudolph with my children. I never get to enjoy reading a Christmas story in our new pajamas. We don’t sip a cup of cocoa after we’ve hung our stockings. By the time we get home they are too exhausted to do anything but whine.

It’s not that I begrudge him the opportunity to see his family. I don’t begrudge our families the time with us—or let’s be honest, our three children. I just want the opportunity to create holiday memories with my children that don’t center around the perplexing puzzle of fitting everything in the trunk. I want our own traditions, our own time as a family, and memories that my children will look back on and smile.

Lorelai is one month old today! She is now 21 1/2 inches long and weighs 9 pounds 5 ounces. I can’t believe how big she’s getting!

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