If there’s one session I was completely required to take, it’s this one! I have trouble balancing work and home life. Something always gets pushed aside. Lately, it’s been my poor family. They’ve suffered through finishing college, launching a new business and my personal obsession with social media. This is a live blog, which means it’s completely unedited. I’m simply taking notes through the session.

Speakers:

Christine Koh, @bostonmamas
Deb Rox, @debontherocks
Megan Jordan, @velveteenmind
Carmen Stacier, @mttsm

How has balance come to you? (Speaker Stories)
Deb: “I’ve burnt out of a lot of careers because I didn’t have a real balance.”
Megan: What matters will be there, when you come back. “I’m willing to lose if it means I can play by my own rules.” Sometimes that means not worrying about missing opportunities, not getting to take the trips, not being on the Top 50 Mom Blogger lists. Do the things that are important to you, and let the rest go.
Carmen: Stop comparing your insides to someone else’s outsides. “Maybe I don’t make everybody else’s Top 50 lists, but I make my kids’ lists.”
Christine: “Remember. Opportunity can be dangerous. It’s not always the right thing.” Every path brings you to the next, even if you turn things down. There’s a real feeling of needing to always be connected so you don’t miss anything, but it’s okay if you do.

After sharing their initial stories, the panel deferred the rest of the discussion to the audience Q&A. I didn’t always catch the questions, but I tried to jot relevant info out of the responses.

Megan: “I have ‘just a seconded’ my kids out of an entire day.” Social media is fast paced and competitive, but you don’t have to do it all.
Christine: If you are feeling anxious, figure out why. If it’s simply because you are worried about missing something, it might not be the right thing. Go with the things that you want to do because you want to do it, not because you want a gold star.
Deb: We want to be present but we aren’t taking a role in making it happen. “If you’re passive, if you wait, the game will win.”

Megan: Focus on doing a few things really well, rather than doing everything halfway. “How about I just do my current projects really well?”
Deb: “If you do everything just to get the gold star, the first ones will be tarnished before you get the last. Do you really want everything if it means you have to clean it?”
Carmen: Saying yes to everything made everyone else happy except me. Don’t say yes—say, “Can I get back to you?” You aren’t liked because you say yes; you’re liked because of who you are.

Megan: “By not asking for help, you’re depriving others of an opportunity.” Asking for help isn’t showing a weakness.
Carmen: Your way isn’t always the right way. Don’t deprive your family of the opportunity to find their own way.

On scheduling specific blocks of time: Christine carves out time during the school day. When it’s time for one thing, shut everything else off.

“You can have it all, just not at the same time.”

Deb: It’s not just that you can’t do everything yourself; it’s that you don’t have to. There are others with expertise you can tap into.

I’m thrilled to hear about developing real community with my readers, from fabulous gals who got it way right, from the start. One of my favorite old school bloggers is on the panel—meeting Mindy in person was such a blessing. Real life hugs, finally! This is a live blog so you’re reading my unedited notes from the session. I promise to come back later to correct grammar & spelling errors.

Speakers:

Laurie Turk, @TipJunkie
Amy Clark, @momadvice
Stephanie Precourt, @babysteph
Mindy Roberts, @themommyblog

Amy: It’s about writing authentically. “People like to know you’re a real person.” People stick around because they get to know you.
Stephanie: Figure out your niche, what your readers are interested in. It doesn’t always have to be *about* that specific niche, but it’s a good common thread to build community. Your readers can start forming their own relationships too.
Laurie: Blogroll on her sidebar – “Find other creative women”

The Golden Blog Rule:
Stephanie: Be generous, genuine and respectful. To get to know my readers, I read their blogs and leave comments. If it’s always getting comments and not giving back. Don’t leave generic comments; find something relevant to connect with.
Laurie: Be your true self on Twitter & Facebook.

Sharing Your Full Experience:
Mindy: “I write the same way I speak.” It lets people know they aren’t alone. Create triumph out of your trials—if you post about things that you wouldn’t necessarily talk about it person, it resonates with people.
Laurie: People want to be invested in you.
Mindy: Get to know your readers and continue conversations by email. It can develop real friendships.

Building a Blog Alliance:
Laurie: It can really unite all of your communities. “We don’t have to compete with each other because there’s enough to go around.” Collaborate with “competitors” on separate projects. Feature your top 10 referrers—they already love you, but give them a little link love back and say thank you.
Mindy: Email people who send you a lot of traffic.

Landing Page:
Amy: When you are featured in anything—a newspaper, magazine, television show—create a landing page for new visitors who found you through them. Include your favorite links, posts you’re most proud of, info on how to subscribe. Top 10 list at the end of each month—top referrers, best posts, etc.
Laurie: Google already likes your top 10 posts. Featuring your top posts also helps your readers connect.
Mindy: Has started featuring “On this day in…” posts on her sidebar.

Community Tools:
Handout available on Blissdom Conference website
Laurie: Have a Facebook fan page for your blog
Amy: Join every single community that is relevant to you, not necessarily your blog.
Laurie recommends Link Within but I find it to be very, very tough on your database. I use YARPP—Yet Another Related Post Plugin instead.

Engaging Readers:
Amy: The Notebook—features cool things from people in her niche each week.
Stephanie: Do something you enjoy, create linkups. Be original, but establish yourself first. You can’t create an awesome linkup and expect people to participate if you don’t have readers.
Laurie: Email is a great way to establish relationships.

How Your Community Affects the “Business of Blogging”
Stephanie: Your readers know you and pay attention when your ads & revenue are conflicting. Cloth diapers her kids so it wouldn’t make sense to display disposable diapers ads or take a trip sponsored by a large diaper company.
Mindy: Keep your integrity when you write product reviews.
Amy: Really read the pitches you get very carefully.
Mindy: Doesn’t use everything she receives and will only talk about items that she personally uses in her life.

This is a live blog, which means it is my unedited notes as the session progresses. It’s hard to live blog a keynote because, while they are fascinating & often inspiring, there is very little solid information to take notes. Kevin Carroll tells the story of his background, the life of growing up with 2 addict parents. He is a storyteller—funny, captivating and full of anecdotes from his childhood. Kevin is well-dressed, with awesome shoes. (And, a purple tie—sold!)

“You have to find a way to blur the lines between work and play.”

Turn ideas into reality—passion, purpose & intention. Work can be your play if you know what you’re doing. “You can’t talk about it, you have to be about it.”

The story of how he met his wife might be my favorite part. His stepdaughter connived to set him up with her mother after hearing Kevin speak at a take your daughter to work day. Oh, how I love children!

The power of a ball: We need to recognize the role of play in our lives. Children third world countries don’t just need books—they need balls.

It has to be not about us, but about the greater movement. {Enter the bouncy balls! So. Much. Fun.} What’s your red rubber ball? What gets you excited about your day?

How’s your “want to”? You gotta want to seek your dreams. You can’t do anything without a want to.

Sometimes, you should tender your resignation as a grownup. “I believe M&Ms are better than money because you can eat them.” Tag, you’re it!

“A closed mouth don’t get fed.” Open your mouth and let people know what your dreams and hopes are. You never know what might be around you to assist in encouraging you to turn your idea into reality.

Expect and respect the unexpected. Eyes of a child, eyes of wonder, will help you.

86,400 seconds in a day—86,400 opportunities to make a difference. “What are you going to do with this day? It’s a gift!”

Rules of the Red Rubber Ball: Find and Sustain Your Life’s Work

What’s Your Hook?: How to Make Your Message Memorable