Just Heather

2009-10-033Our weekend getaway date is brought to you by the letter G—good friends, Giordano’s and geeky guitarists! We were in Chicago for less than 24 hours, but it was an amazing weekend. I love road trips, honestly, for the uninterrupted conversations and connection. With a construction delay and marathon traffic, we had plenty of time for both. We arrived at our hotel (Intercontinental at a great deal via Hotwire.com) with barely enough time for a quick makeup touch-up before our planned dinner with an old friend.
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I love that my husband was willing to give part of our weekend away to finally meet a longtime internet friend in person. It was, of course, not like meeting someone new at all—Kathryn and I talked and enjoyed one another like old girlfriends. Because we are. The husbands indulged us and I am so glad our schedules worked so we could connect while she was in town for the marathon. We had dinner at Giordano’s (after a quick stop for my gluten meds) and it was delish, as always!

We took a cab straight to the concert. This is the part I was a little concerned about. I wasn’t particularly interested in seeing Jonathan Coulton, even though it was technically the reason for our trip. The hubby is the fan boy there, but I’m nothing if not supportive. We had also heard he would be performing a Flood show in tribute to They Might Be Giants who were performing across town. I love TMBG so I figured all was not lost. Besides, it was at a bar. I’m on a quest to sample signature martinis across the country. Park West didn’t have one, but my server came up with something fabulous! I had four a couple throughout the show.

2009-10-037The concert began with the opening band, naturally. Paul and Storm kicked off the evening with—what else—Opening Band. I had never heard them before but was instantly in love. They are smart, funny and Storm is sexy as hell. Um, I mean, they are both very talented. What can I say? I love a hot geek! The Flood Show with P&S and Jonathan Coulton came next and was amazing. It was fascinating to watch, especially knowing they had never performed that set before and had only practiced it for the week.

Jonathan Coulton was about what I expected. I loved watching the hubby enjoy himself. In fact, I spent much of his set people watching. The drunkety drunk girl in front of us provided much entertainment. (You gotta love an evening when you can enjoy four a few drinks and still not be the drunk girl.) Super fan girl with the dance moves in the front section was also highly amusing. However, the best part of our experience came after the concert. We hung around, anticipating a meet ‘n greet.

2009-10-036Security tried to shoo everyone away and insisted there wouldn’t be. This seemed off to me, from what I had read about the bands, so we hung around the merchandise table. I wanted to get the newly released Jonathan Coulton scratch ‘n sniff stickers for our little fan girl at home. Brenia is obsessed with Re: Your Brains, and has many of his other songs memorized (you know, the age appropriate ones). Our persistence paid off as all three talented men arrived to hang out with their fans for a bit. Of course, for this scene I was cast as the drunk girl.

2009-10-035The hubby got to shake fans with an idol, chat for a few minutes and collect a picture for our growing celebrity photo wall. I got to drool over Paul and Storm, and may have accidentally told Storm he was going on my celebrity list. How secure does a marriage have to be for your hubby to allow you to stalk hit on another guy while you are on a date? Of course, everyone knows a celebrity doesn’t count. Still, I’d say that’s a testament to how far we have come in the last few months. I’m willing to sit through a concert I have no interest in hearing and he’s willing to watch me drool over celebs.

That’s true love, yo.

When we embarked on our first alphabet journey, we selected the Melting Pot as F is for fondue. I chose it specifically because I had put a romantic dinner at the melting pot on my 40×40 list. However, by the time we got to F, romance was nonexistent. It was just not going to be what I wanted it to be, and I tried to convince him to go somewhere else. I believe I suggested Red Robin (F is for French Fries?), but we had a plan and—by, golly—we were sticking to it.

Whether it was self-fulfilling prophecy or I was just right all along will remain a mystery, but our $100 dinner at The Melting Pot was not what I had envisioned when I added it to my list. We were tense, quiet and I was irritated at spending so much money on just another dinner. The setting was nice—they had given us one of the private booths—and the food was good, but the experience only hammered home the fact that we were not a couple. It would be the last of our alphabet dates, and the beginning of the end.

When we started over (both literally and figuratively), the Melting Pot found itself once again listed at letter F. This time, I decided, we were going all out! I wore my little black dress. He wore his pinstripe suit and the fedora! He looked completely delicious and I couldn’t wait to have him to myself over a fondue pot of more delicious. MFJ graciously agreed to spend a quiet evening at home (ours, not hers) supervising a slumber party. The girls were excited, I was thrilled she could do my hair (and loan me the right earrings), then we were off to a late dinner at the Melting Pot.

This time, it was everything I had hoped it would be. The only drawback was we didn’t get a private booth, even though we had actually requested it this time. We were, instead, seated in Lovers’ Lane. It was set off a ways from the open seating area, with high back booths to provide a more secluded dining experience. Regardless, the food was fantastic (especially the Yin Yang Martini), he told me I was beautiful and, most importantly, the love songs in the background meant something.

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Allison and Me

Allison and Me

Alternate Title: The family reunion blogging made. Seriously, I organized this reunion in an effort to see long lost cousins. We have reconnected over the last several years through our blogs (and Facebook), but I haven’t seen Allison in over 20 years and I had never met her family. Of course, blogging made me feel like I knew them and it certainly didn’t feel like 20 years had passed. I’m sure I’ll have much more to say about last weekend in the days and weeks to come, but for now a pictorial summary will have to do.

2009-09-190Babysitters are pretty hard to come by around these parts, but MFJ has volunteered to watch the girls now and then. When we decided we wanted to use E for exploring, her free Sunday afternoon sounded like the perfect opportunity.  Spencer had actually looked into geocaching a few years ago, but we didn’t own a GPS system at the time. Then, during last year’s fall camporee, I learned about letterboxing. We decided to explore the trailway in our hometown, which we’d somehow never done before, in search of hidden treasures.

2009-09-187We used his iPhone and the Geocaching application to start our exploration along the Monon Trail. Since this was our first attempt at treasure hunting, we decided to start simple. Or so we thought. We had a heck of a time finding our first cache, until we realized that we’d already found it and added it to our trash collection. We decided to combine our adventure with a small eco-effort and collect litter along the trail. The dog toy didn’t look at all out of place along a trail where residents frequently walk their dogs. It just looked like something accidentally left behind.

2009-09-188Once we figured it out, we added our name to the log and moved to our next target. This one we found a little more easily. It was a small treasure cache, but the contents were soggy. We left behind one of the treasures we had brought along for just this sort of thing, but didn’t find anything dry enough to take. The next time we head out, I’m adding baggies to our packing list so we can update any caches along the way. It was a fun experience, for sure, even though we have a lot of learning to do. This time around, we packed water, snacks, a few treasures for trading and a pen, thinking we were set.

2009-09-186_595It worked out pretty well for the few hours we were out and about, but next time I’m packing baggies, bandages and a bigger trash bag. All of that is beside the point, though, because we had a really great time together! I’m not usually an outdoor person, but I enjoyed walking hand in hand with my hubby in the fresh air. It was a great daytime date and one we’ll probably repeat. Next time I’d like to go with more puzzle-solving caches, for a fun twist. I think it would also be fun to hide a cache or two. I’ve always had a thing for pirates!

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So, there’s this guy. He sings stupid (some might say funny), geeky songs. And the hubby is kind of obsessed. Because he’s a geek. A few weeks ago, I decided to see if he was playing in our area around the holidays because I thought concert tickets would make a great Christmas gift. Yes, I know Christmas is still months away but it’s what I do. When I found out that he was playing (kinda sorta) near here in October and that tickets were only $20, I couldn’t really keep the information to myself.

chicagoI thought he might buy a ticket and take a quick road trip with a buddy. Except, apparently, none of his friends cared about the concert either. He was all set to buy a ticket and hit the show by himself (yeah, I married a dork), but I really hated the idea of him making a 3 or 4 hour (which usually ends up being 5 or 6 with traffic) drive on his own. So I made the ultimate sacrifice. I volunteered to go with him to the concert. You see, I’ve had the chance to see a favorite of mine in concert twice in the last year so it’s really only fair.

This is my geek.

This is my geek.

I suggested we spend the night and make a bit of a weekend out of it. The idea even occurred to find a way to turn it into an alphabet date, to take some of the sting out of the price tag (those are budgeted!). My only caveat was he would need to find the sitter. So, he immediately bought concert tickets and then promptly did not find a sitter. My sister finally volunteered to come spend the night with our girls and we were set! The only thing left to do was figure out how it fit into alphabetical order. C was already taken!

We had finally decided on an uber-dorky “G = geeky guitarist” when the trip got infinitely more interesting (for me, anyway). I discovered a very dear, longtime internet friend would be in town at the same time! Arrangements were made to meet Kathryn and her husband for dinner on Saturday before the concert. Meeting internet friends in real life? Yeah, G is for Geek. To top it off, our dinner would be at Giordano’s (a huge personal favorite, even if I do have to swallow a ton of pills just to eat it), rounding out the letter G theme quite nicely.

candy-shopWe were in Chicago less than 24 hours so it was quite a whirlwind. I love Chicago, and I was a bit disappointed not to have more time, but the destination wasn’t really the point of the trip. Alphabet Dating is a journey—it’s all about being in love. I fell in love with the windmill farm (all over again) on the way there, and my new favorite candy shop on the way back. And in between, I fell in love with my hubby a little more too. (Also? Just a tiny bit with Storm, but the hubby’s okay with that.)

Now that you know what all goes into planning an Alphabet Date, I’m sure you can’t wait to hear all about it. First, though, I have to unpack. Because it takes an awful lot of stuff to go away for just one night! (Even when you forget half of what you needed.) I really do want to tell you all about it (okay, not all)—especially the concert that I didn’t really want to go to because it was a-freaking-mazing! And, it’s okay that I preferred the opening act, right? (Don’t let me forget to tell you all about how I told one of the duo that he was going on my list.)

monumentSpencer and I have lived in the Indianapolis area for more than 10 years now (though never actually in Indy) so we’ve spent our fair share of time in the Circle City. Mostly, though, our trips downtown are centered around some sort of event so our activities are very specific and pre-planned. I always see the horse-drawn carriages, pass by the canal to watch the boats go by and drool over landmark, fine dining experiences we usually can’t afford. For our 4th alphabet date, we decided we were really Doing Downtown.

Our anniversary weekend provided the perfect opportunity, especially after my parents volunteered to take the girls. With the girls off to Camp Grandma’s and an entire weekend before us, we were anticipating such wonders as childfree grocery shopping, grown-up movies and sleeping in! We did all of that—and a whole lot more. After an indulgent sleep-filled morning, we headed down to Indianapolis. (I love how we always say that like it’s so! far! away! It’s, maybe, 30 minutes, but I hate traffic so it’s not something I do often.)

It did occur to us that since we’d never done any of the things on our list before, we should call ahead and see how it works. Does St. Elmo’s require a reservation? Yup! We got a 5pm. How late is the pedal boat rental place open? 8pm—we should have plenty of time for our dinner first. What else do we want to do? We decided to play the rest by year. Clearly, we don’t get out much.

st-elmoDinner at St. Elmo’s was decent. For the price we paid, I’d love to say dinner was fabulous or even a trite “you pay for the atmosphere” but, really, it’s just overpriced steak. The hubby really liked their world famous shrimp cocktail, though, so all was not lost. I’ve had much better steaks and I wasn’t super impressed with the atmosphere anyway. I mean, it’s cool the waiters were all in tuxes and all, but we have tablecloths and cloth napkins at home (yeah, we’re fancy like that) so for a $125 meal, I’m expecting to be fawned over.

The cosmo was super strong (points for that one, bartender!) and the food was decent. Still, we got to visit an official Indianapolis landmark. Now that it’s crossed off the list, I’m all good. If you ever want to say you went, I recommend stopping by just for appetizers and drinks—the shrimp cocktail is their signature dish anyway and, quite possibly, the best thing on the menu (this from someone who eats nothing from the sea). It’s a great way to have the experience without the full price tag.

canalAfter dinner, we wandered over to the canal. We had never actually been down to the canal (just watched it from the street), much less in it. We rented a pedal boat and enjoyed a good hour floating along. It really is quite beautiful. We had a truly lovely evening for it. The only thing better would have been a canal float by moonlight, but we work with what we’ve got. Now that we know it’s out there, I’m sure we’ll find another opportunity for it. Maybe next time, we’ll take a gondola ride (who knew we even had them in Indiana?).

sundaeAfter returning our boat, we took a walk up the other side of the canal. And, landed straight in a jazz concert at White River Park. From there, we decided to head in the general direction of Monument Circle—Spencer wanted some shots of the monument itself and I wanted dessert at South Bend Chocolate Cafe. We both got our wish, even though the circle was overrun by motorcycles. There was apparently a large event that day as parts of downtown were blocked to cars so heading home after our night was another experience altogether.

This was definitely not our most inexpensive date night, but it was well worth it! We spent a wonderful, relaxing day together, our marriage was in a very good place and it was great to share some things I’ve always wanted to do. Exploring the city tourist-style was a little grandiose for one day, and we didn’t get to everything. We’ve decided to use I for Indianapolis for the rest of it—slated for December to enjoy the holiday lights. Maybe next time we’ll remember to take some pictures of ourselves.

I love a guy in a fedora, but my guy in a fedora leaves me speechless. Happy Wordless Wednesday!

2009-09-071

2009-09-072

I don’t think he gets it.

Alternate Title: How a meteor saved my marriage.

Okay, so this Perseid thing comes along every August. I am 32 years old and had never seen it. That’s why it went on 40×40“>the official list. I hadn’t made a specific plan to watch it this year, although having it on my list did put it on my radar. I was paying attention to the dates and the optimal viewing time was middle of the night the evening before Blog Indiana. I didn’t think that was wise.

Then, instead of going to bed early so I’d be well rested for my conference, I stayed up late fighting with my husband. I’ve made no secret of our ongoing struggles. They’ve come to a head in huge blowups a couple of times in the last few years, and this one was bad. As in packing my suitcase bad. Then, I read this and cried. Buckets. But it wasn’t enough to make me go back into the house. Pride, probably. Fear, a lot.

I was standing outside thinking about how many times we’ve had the same fight. Wondering how we could co-parent separately if we couldn’t even co-parent together. Trying to figure out how to make it on my own. Contemplating how you can love someone so very much and still not be able to find a way to live together. Something in the sky caught my eye, but as I’ve never seen a meteor shower I didn’t really know what it would look like or what to expect.

As I was looking up, a huge meteor, as in movie effects huge, streaked across the sky. I was doing it—I was crossing off another one! That’s when the tears started. I wanted to tell someone that I had just moved another step closer to 40×40 and he wasn’t there. I didn’t stop to think; I just tore back into the house with tears streaming down my face to tell him I was watching it and he should go watch it too.

He joined me in the front yard to see the meteor shower, but then he grabbed my hand and tugged me to the backyard for the better view. And never let go. We quietly enjoyed the show for a bit, until Spencer went back into the house for a blanket so we could lie down. We watched for a couple hours, actually, and started talking. I realized our life, our marriage is kind of like that meteor shower.

It has its darkness. It has bright beauty. And just when you think it’s over, something spectacular happens. And, just like Perseid, we’ll be celebrating every August. Our latest Alphabet Dating adventure occurred just a few weeks ago for our 12th anniversary. We’re in this together, for life; we just have a few things to figure out along the way.